Come One, Come All

New faces are coming to Morgantown. Are we ready?

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Talk of extending the red carpet to remote workers around the country who are looking for a change of scenery has dominated headlines in West Virginia recently. But there’s more to the program than anyone’s talking about on the record. 

Morgantown magazine recently verified that the remote worker program is hoping to capture workers from much further afield than previously thought: outer space. According to leading scientists, aliens, too, appreciate the outdoor recreation opportunities here and even love the scenery. In fact, USA Today reported that West Virginia ranks 17th in the country in frequency of UFO sightings—821 were catalogued between 2001 and 2015. They just keep coming back.

Governor Jim Justice is all the way on board. He’s been in outer space for a while now and in 2018 was quoted by a local newspaper as saying, “… I’ve purchased a used space shuttle and am trying to figure out a way to sell rides on that space shuttle to the Planet Mongo.” Sounds like Justice might know more about those 800-plus sightings in the Mountain State than USA Today does. 

So while the state Legislature continues its trajectory of exclusion, here in Morgantown we might need to start practicing embracing others who look and act much differently than we do. (We’re already pretty good at that.) Don’t be surprised if this time next year you’re rubbing shoulders with this guy at that big networking event, or if you find him in the raft paddling next to you down the Cheat River. Aliens just want to have fun, too. 

Oh, and so do we … April fool!